God's love – Page 3 – A Million God Stories

#151 Little Church by the Creek

June 6, 2020February 28, 2018 by pamamilliongodstoriescom

Photo by Nicole Tarpoff

In 1997, my sister was taken to the hospital because of a problem with her foot from diabetes. I had been to

visit her and for some reason that night when I came out of her room I decided to go to the bathroom before getting on the elevator. When I got out of bathroom and got on elevator to go home, a woman on the elevator with me was very upset. She told me her husband was very sick and she felt very alone. We got off the elevator and walked out to the parking lot together.

I am a caring person, but to ask a complete stranger if I could pray with her in a hospital parking lot … this was out of my comfort zone. But I felt God calling me to do this, so I asked if I could pray for her. I felt that God told me, “You have got to be Me to this person.” I vividly remember standing in the hospital parking lot at dusk, huddled with her in prayer, snow coming down around us.

I prayed for a sense of peace for her and healing and comfort for her husband. God has given me many opportunities in the past to do something similar, but this is the first time I said yes and I’m so glad I had the courage to do it. It only took a few minutes to share His love with someone else. I felt so blessed that God had given the woman a sense of peace and comfort and that I had a part in that.

I have learned to always be available for God to work through me and that when I do, God will show up and show me what to do. God is faithful. He will equip you. He equipped me and gave me the words to say to the woman in the hospital parking lot. I had that ability before that encounter but was afraid or embarrassed to do anything. But when I obeyed what I felt God calling me to do, He equipped me with the words to pray. Since that time, I have felt God urging me to pray for people and I now respond to those promptings.

A Million God Stories is a Christ-centered ministry which offers a platform for Christians from all streams of Christian faith to give praise for how God has worked in their lives. Christ heals in infinitely creative ways and we acknowledge that His way of helping may differ from person to person.

#141 Little Church by the Creek: The Waterfall of God’s Love

June 6, 2020January 21, 2018 by pamamilliongodstoriescom

Photo by Anna Carroll

I grew up the youngest of six children in an abusive home with alcoholic parents. We didn’t go to church often, only when my mom and dad were sober enough. When I was 9 years old a neighbor shot a dove and it fell in our yard. We tried to nurse it back to health but it died. For the dove’s funeral, I put on my dad’s suit (he was a big, strong Army man about 6’4”). The sleeves and pants were too long and I had to pull them up. I performed the funeral for the dove with all my family there listening. My oldest sister said later, “Timmy, you are going to be a preacher.” I believe the Holy Spirit planted that seed.

But from age 9 to 33 I certainly didn’t live that life. I got married when I was a senior in college to a girl I had dated in high school. My life was dysfunctional and I was looking for validation from others. I was 24 when we divorced. After that, I lived with friends for about a year—basically I was homeless. I was working but didn’t have money. I was spending money on other things, mainly alcohol.

About a year after my divorce, I asked a woman I knew from a newspaper where I had worked if she would consider dating someone like me and she said she would pray about it. She prayed and fasted for five days. She said yes with two conditions: 1) I will always love Someone more than you, and 2) I am a virgin now and I will be a virgin when we get married.

We married in 1991 and I worked for Ganett, the parent company for USA Today. At age 29, Ganett offered me a job as Managing Editor and then Executive Editor. I was making really good money but working 20 hours a day. I had become a flaming workaholic. In May of 1997, I was at the worst point of my life—depressed and exhausted. I did go to church but I was not a Christian. We talked of divorce. I started making plans for suicide and attempted four times. I was trying to end my wife’s suffering because I knew I was a bad husband.

I had decided to try again and had talked to a financial planner about how to make financial plans for my family after my death. That week my pastor asked if I would go to a Promise Keepers event. I didn’t want to go to a Jesus event but I didn’t want people to think I didn’t want to go to a good event and said yes only to put on a show. On May 10, 1997, I got into a van with seven to eight guys and sure enough, there was Jesus music playing all the way. I didn’t want to listen to it. My plan had been that two weeks from that day I would kill myself.

We got to the stadium and there was a pastor that came out and started sharing jokes. Lousy jokes. I kept thinking, this is the biggest waste of time, and got madder and madder. Finally, he stepped back from pulpit and paused awkwardly. I have 69,999 witnesses as to what happened next. He stepped back to pulpit and said, “I apologize. I was brought here to tell jokes but I don’t feel funny. There is a guy here who if he doesn’t get his life right, will not be here in two weeks.” As I sat on the top bleacher of the old Riverfront Stadium, I couldn’t believe what I just heard. A lump formed in my throat and I started crying. The pastor started telling my story. He said this guy is a workaholic, his marriage is a mess, he has hidden addictions, and he doesn’t think God is real. He talked about it being this man’s last chance and that God was calling him right now to believe in Him. There were 70,000 people there, but he preached the service like he was speaking to one person. “What do you have to lose?” he asked. I knew he was talking to me. At some point, I got up and went all the way down to where he was preaching and knelt by the stage. I prayed, “God, I’ve screwed up. If you can do anything with this life, here I am.”

I cried the rest of the weekend and ran the stadium out of toilet paper and tissues. I surrendered that weekend and something happened. I was born again. My mind changed at that moment. I have never struggled with suicide and depression or addictions since then. I went from old to new in that moment. Everything else was just crushed by the waterfall of God’s love. On the way home, I was the loudest singer of the praise songs in the van.

When we got home from the event, I had forgotten my house keys and had to wake my wife to let me in. When she opened the door she said, “What happened to you? Your countenance… Everything is changed.” I grabbed her hand and we prayed together. The Lord reminded me of my call to be a preacher. The next day was Sunday May 12, Mother’s Day, and we went to church. I told my wife her Mother’s Day gift was that I was leaving the newspaper job and becoming a pastor.

I attended seminary and became an associate pastor at a large church in Indiana. Four years into this job, I was asked to become the lead pastor at a large church in Kentucky. My wife and I felt like this was the way to go. But then I received a call from church leadership. They said they would like me to consider pastoring a different church, a much smaller church, that was having some problems, but they believed that the Lord could do amazing things at this church. My wife and I went to this little church by the creek to visit. I wanted to see how the Holy Spirit led me. It was early spring the day we arrived at the church. I got out of our van and as I stood in the parking lot of the little white church, it started snowing. The sun was peeking out from behind the clouds. It was like a Currier and Ives picture—a surreal moment. I felt strongly that God was leading us to this church.

We have been here going on 13 years. We have ten worship services and reach about 1,200 people per week. Last year we had 399 baptisms, 327 of those were first time baptisms. Since 2010, we have had 138 people called from our congregation to ministry. But it’s not me. It is what God’s done here that is amazing. I failed a class at every level of education—even in seminary, I failed evangelism. As a kid, I had a speech impediment, a horrible stutter and a real lisp. I knew what I wanted to say but couldn’t get the words out. I was in special classes even through high school. But God has used me in spite of all of this.

I owe Jesus everything—my marriage, my kids, my life. I died with Christ and everything I have now is gain. I know that every day my life is His and I owe Him every single moment. This fuels the passion that I live life from and the passion that I preach with. I believe in the begetting principle. Hate begets hate. Love begets love. I love the people of this church and I have a high-octane level of passion that begets passion in the people. I make mistakes… But the passion for Jesus cannot be questioned. God has used me to ignite passion in this congregation. The church leadership was right all those years ago when they asked me to come here. The Lord has done amazing things at this little church by the creek.

#138 Softening My Heart

June 6, 2020January 4, 2018 by pamamilliongodstoriescom

Photo by Killian Rose

On July 25, 2015 I was sitting on a motorcycle at a stoplight when a Dodge pickup truck driven by a drunk driver hit me from behind going 45 miles per hour. I was crushed between the truck and the car in front of me. My pelvis was shattered, my colon torn in half, my liver lacerated, ribs broken, arm broken, lung punctured, and the carotid artery in my neck nearly severed. I woke up under the pickup truck in so much pain, thinking, I have to get out from under this truck. I prayed, “God help me!” I was flown by helicopter to the university hospital. The paramedics kept saying, “Stay with us, stay with us,” which made me think I was dying.

When I came out of surgery, the doctors told me that I wouldn’t be able to have kids, I couldn’t go back to college for at least two years (I was 19 years old), and I would need to go to a rehabilitation hospital for a year to learn to walk again.

On my ninth day in the hospital I was able to move from my bed to a chair. I was released to my home, not a rehabilitation hospital, but I was still healing from multiple broken bones and was not able to bear weight on my legs. I had to have help brushing my teeth, getting a shower, shaving my legs, and going to the bathroom. My mom died when I was 14 and at the time of the accident my father was a single parent. He was happy to help me with all of the personal care I needed but I hated that he had to do all of those things for me. It was very humbling.

In October, I went back to doctor and found out that my bones were healing more quickly than expected. The doctor prescribed physical therapy and by the end of four weeks of physical therapy, I was able to walk with no severe limp. So instead of one year of inpatient therapy in a rehabilitation facility, I was able to walk with one month of outpatient therapy. In fact, this fall I hiked eight miles on a nearby mountain trail. I am so thankful to God for the remarkable healing! I was also able to go back to college in one semester instead of staying out two years.

After the accident, I experienced more than just physical healing. My mom’s death had been unexpected, a complication from a surgery. We had been so close and it was very hard for me to lose her. My dad is the pastor at our church and my mom had been the worship leader. She was also a teacher at my school. I missed her everywhere—at school, at home, at church. I felt like I couldn’t even go to my pastor for help because it was my dad and he was grieving too.

Years after my mom’s death, my dad got engaged to a woman, but I wasn’t nice to her and didn’t accept her. Accepting her meant I had to let go of my mom and I couldn’t do that. I missed her so much.

I hardened myself to protect myself from the hurt. I had closed off myself against relationships. Before the accident, I didn’t love myself and I didn’t think anyone else loved me—not even God. After the accident, so many people took care of me. There was an overwhelming sense of love and support of people rallying around me. I realized how many people loved me and that God had never stopped loving me. And despite how I had treated my dad’s fiancé, she showed me love and grace and took good care of me. I now see that my anger and bitterness had been hindering my dad and younger brother too from fully healing. Now our home is a place of real peace and it is a life-giving place to be.

Through this experience, God has softened my heart to receive and give love to others. I had internalized so much anger and hurt that it festered into external thorns. I tried to hide it and act okay, but I was hurting people. I didn’t want to accept that I hadn’t fully grieved. I had to realize the internal hurt. It was like a coffee cup with a hole in the bottom—I got all filled up on Sunday at church, but it would quickly drain out and there was no complete deliverance from my pain. I had to acknowledge the hole so that God could heal the hole and I could experience complete healing. And this is what has occurred. God is making a beautiful picture from the broken pieces.

The person driving the truck was a 20-year-old female driving on a suspended license, two times over the legal alcohol limit. Nearly a month after the accident, I was contacted by the commonwealth attorney about pressing charges. He recommended a 20-year prison sentence with the possibility of parole in 17 years. I told him I wanted to pray about what to do. I talked to my dad and the chaplain at my college. I was being asked to make this decision at 20 years of age. I wondered how I could send someone to jail for 20 years. And what if she had kids? I knew what it was like to lose a mom. I didn’t want to take a mom away from her children. But I also didn’t want her to go back on the road and harm someone else.

My chaplain talked to me about restorative justice, which is a model where the offender knows what has happened to the offended and they plan what is best for the recovering offender so that they don’t offend again. I met with the commonwealth attorney and asked about restorative justice, but he said there was nothing like that in our state. Regardless, I didn’t want her to serve a 20-year prison sentence. Instead, she was sentenced to five years of probation with six months in jail and another six months in rehabilitation and 100 hours of community service. Her conditions included random drug screening and sobriety tests and maintaining a full-time job. The attorney was shocked that I didn’t want her to be punished more severely. He said with her alcohol level and the extent of my injuries, he was surprised that he wasn’t working with the surviving family in a homicide case.

Fast forward a year, and I got a text from my dad that the woman had been called in for her random drug screening and she drove to the courthouse with a suspended license and drugs in her system. Since she violated her conditions, she would have to go to jail for 20 years. I had gotten a lot of compliments from people about the grace I had shown her and I told them it was God impressing upon me to do this. But when she violated her conditions, I got so angry with her and thought she spat on my grace. And then I realized we do this with God—we spit on His grace. I have done this. It was humbling to realize this and it helped me to be less angry and more compassionate.

Even though I still suffer physical pain and limitations, God has brought good from the accident. Because I lost my mother, I have been able to comfort other young people who have lost a parent from a place of really knowing how difficult it is. I have personally experienced great physical healing, but the greatest healing has been the spiritual restoration of self-worth that is not based on me following handed-down religious traditions, but instead is based on God’s grace. I am confident that there is nothing I can do to undo His love for me.

#126 Journey to Jordan: God Is Love

June 6, 2020October 17, 2017 by pamamilliongodstoriescom

Photo by James Ramos

It was golden hour, sunset in the Wadi Rum desert of Jordan. Our small group of Christian pilgrims traveled over sand dunes in the open bed of a small pick-up truck at a speed that both terrified and thrilled me. The sun was hot on our faces, sand beating and stinging our skin. My eyes wanted to close to shut out the sand, but I didn’t want to miss a moment of this otherworldly place, the indescribable beauty of it. The truck stopped and we got out to watch the sun melt into the vast, orange, sandstone mountains. I felt so small. Praise for God, who created this great cathedral of sand and stone, rose inside of me.

Before the mountains were born or you brought forth the whole world, from everlasting to everlasting you are God.

Psalm 90:2

Darkness fell and we continued our journey to a Bedouin campsite. In the distance, white lights twinkled from the caves in the side of the mountain, homes to some of our Bedouin hosts. Bedouins are nomadic people who raise livestock in the deserts of the Middle East. They have inhabited this land for over 2,000 years. These kind, hospitable people prepared a feast for us—meat and vegetables cooked in a pit three feet under the earth, coffee brewed with cardamom over an open fire, crackling in the cool desert night. After dinner, we wandered beyond the campsite into the black darkness of the night, nearly bumping into a camel resting nearby. We laid down in the sand and gazed at the splendor of the night sky. I have never seen such a sky… so clear, so vast, so many bright, twinkling stars, even shooting stars. And again, I felt so small. A great sense of awe came over me, a deep appreciation of God as Creator of the universe.

Over and over while on this trip to the Holy Land of Jordan, I have asked God to reveal to me what it is that He would have me to learn about Him. What I have felt as I have traveled this beautiful Holy Land is a deep sense of His greatness and power. Although our human minds are unable to comprehend this completely, God has given us a glimpse of Himself in His creation.

And God has also revealed Himself to us in the life of His Son, Jesus. When we visited the baptismal site of Christ at the Jordan River, an expert explained the history and geography of the area. He shared that the place where Jesus was baptized, where He began His ministry, is the lowest place on earth. Of all the places Jesus could have begun His ministry, why the lowest place on earth? Perhaps to show us there is no depth that He will not reach to find us, to love us, to save us. No one—NO ONE—is so low that Christ cannot save him.

Lowly seems to be a theme throughout the life of Jesus. He was born in a lowly stable among common farm animals, the child of poor parents who fled with Him to become refuges in a foreign land. At the end of His ministry, He took on the lowly posture of a Gentile slave, humbly washing the feet of His disciples, providing a model of humility and service for us all. He was unjustly treated as a lowly criminal and endured a humiliating and excruciating death for our sakes because of His love, God’s love for us.

As I leave the Holy Land, I am struck by the contrast of God’s greatness and the humble life of His Son on earth who came serving, healing, and saving us. “Who are we Lord that You, in your infinite greatness and power, are mindful of us?” (Psalm 8:4). Perhaps the question is not who are WE but who is HE? And the answer I believe is this: GOD IS LOVE, and this too is so vast, so great, so powerful that it is beyond all human comprehension.

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:38–39

#120 Undeserved Kindness

June 6, 2020August 18, 2017 by pamamilliongodstoriescom

Photo by Trevor Rapp

Growing up I didn’t have a good example of living a life of true faith. My mentality was, “God’s up there and He’s hard to please.” And I continued this way of believing into adulthood. I didn’t feel like I could count on anyone. I felt like I could do it myself, on my own. I didn’t know I had Jesus to go to.

When my second child was born, I started to really put pressure on myself to provide for my family. I felt a new sense of urgency and commitment to “do my best for my family,” and to me that meant I needed to work more. I am a very competitive person by nature, and although I knew some people were more talented than me, I felt my strength was my ability to outwork others.

But working more resulting in being away from my family more and this was NOT a good thing. I put all the responsibility on my wife to take care of the children. We spent less and less time together as a couple. Our roles as parents supplanted our roles as husband and wife. My family history included a lot of divorce. My parents, grandparents, and aunts and uncles were divorced. I went into marriage thinking, “If this doesn’t work out, we can just get a divorce.” My wife’s parents were happily married and they were very involved in their church. They were great models for me.

Someone at work began to pursue me. I think about the story of Joseph and how Potiphar’s wife pursued him but he resisted. I wish I could have been like Joseph. I wish I would have resisted. But I didn’t, and because I didn’t, my wife and I went through a very difficult time. I hurt my wife so badly. Fortunately, because of my wife’s family, she did not give up on me. I went to talk to her father about what I had done. I was ashamed and embarrassed. He came out to my car, sat with me and showed me love that I didn’t deserve. I will never forget the unconditional love he showed me. It still moves me greatly to think of the grace and undeserved kindness he showed me.

It was a tough five to six years after that. I didn’t know if I would ever get back the confidence and trust of my wife. During this season, I met the man who led me to Christ. We met through a work project. I remember the first time I walked into his studio. There was so much peace there. He invited me to coffee to talk. I thought, “What does he want from me?” But he just listened as I poured my heart out. He asked if he could pray for me. We were still in the coffee shop and I was worried someone would see us. It just felt awkward, like everyone was looking at us. But I said “yes” and he prayed a beautiful, powerful prayer for me. This coffee shop meeting was a turning point in my life. I thank God for this man because he helped me to understand who God is and what it looks like to live a life in relationship with Jesus.

Over time, my relationship was restored with my wife and family. But there were other changes I needed to make. I had fallen into the trap of defining myself by my job. I needed a change in how I viewed myself at work and a new understanding of my true identity and worth. For years, I had been working for the same company and I really wanted to leave and start my own business, but the time wasn’t right financially. I asked the Lord to show me how He could use me in my current work situation. God provided opportunities for me to be a light to others at my work. I began to understand why I was at work, that it was about serving God and people and letting God use my talents for Him. My desire became to glorify God in what I was doing professionally. Eventually, the time was right and I started my own business. Although it has been really hard at times, I know God will use it all for something better than I can imagine. God has brought clients to my business who pray with me—we even pray together about our work. This has been such a blessing to me. I am trying to offer every part of my work day to God. Before I go into a meeting, I will often pray, “Lord, I don’t know what this meeting is about, but let me be what You want me to be.”

Throughout this journey, God has brought many people to love me and help me. I have a wonderful church, where there is excellent teaching and many tools and support. I joined a Saturday morning men’s group at our church where I found a community of men who encourage me and help me grow. For the last six years, I have been in a Bible Study Fellowship group where I have continued to learn. I am so thankful for the blessing of community that God has provided. I still struggle and there is much more to be written of my story, but this I know: I have a Father who loves me unconditionally, who restores my brokenness, and who provides for me and guides me. He is available to me every moment of every day. I don’t have to do life on my own.

#117 Simple Laundry Room Prayer

June 6, 2020July 12, 2017 by pamamilliongodstoriescom

Photo by Erin E. Photography

I overreacted. I know it now and I knew it when it happened.

My husband was getting ready for work and had made a comment that just hit me the wrong way. I don’t even remember exactly what he said. But it made me mad. He was nearly ready to walk out the door and I wanted to say something back to him to let him know I did not appreciate the comment. But I knew in my anger that my words would be harsh and it would not lead to a meaningful conversation. He was going out the door to work and this wasn’t the way I wanted to say goodbye for the day. I had been down this road before and knew that my careless, angry words in the heat of the moment could lead down a rabbit hole of more and more hurtful words—not productive, not constructive, but tearing down kind of words.

I needed God’s help to control my urge to say angry words that I would regret. I went to our laundry room and prayed. My prayer went something like this, “Lord give me your words, not my words. Help me see my husband as you see him, with love. Help me be loving to him.”

I walked out of the laundry room calmer and when I looked at my husband at the back door in his suit dressed for work, I was overcome with gratitude to him for the way he provides for our family. And I noticed how handsome he looked in his suit. With God’s help, I was able to pay my husband a sincere compliment spoken in love and gratitude. God heard and responded to my simple laundry room prayer to overcome my petty irritation and help me love my husband.

What a gift to be able to rely on Him in all things, no matter how small. God cares. God listens and He will help.

For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love. Romans 5:5

#116. Darkness Into Light

June 6, 2020July 1, 2017 by pamamilliongodstoriescom

Artwork by Jacob Cecil

I grew up the daughter of a pastor, the oldest of six kids. Ever since I can remember as a child, our family was involved in international missions. The first time I went on a mission trip I was seven years old. This shaped my heart with a global perspective. One year on my birthday my dad encouraged me to have an adventure. “You’ve always had a heart for the nations. Don’t stay here in the United States and miss out on pursuing your dreams.”

I was working as a nurse at time. I had no debt and nothing tying me down. His challenge took me by surprise and I wasn’t quite ready at that time. But the idea kept playing over and over in my head and I began to seriously pray about it. I quietly explored mission options in different nations, though I didn’t feel called to a specific country. After weeks of praying there was an opportunity to serve in Central America, and God confirmed that this was the opportunity I was to take.

I contacted a specific ministry I felt led to serve and they were willing to have me. I signed up to work with them for five months and I thought that would be the extent of my adventure. By month four I began to hear stories of little girls working in prostitution in the country where I was serving. I started exploring why this was happening.

At that time, in 2009, there was limited information on sex trafficking and its impact and pervasiveness. So a friend and I went to a little town close to the border where we had heard this was happening, trying to understand the complex nature of this problem and if there was a way to help. We took multiple trips to this border town and developed relationships with churches and local authorities. Through those relationships we learned more about what was happening and the factors that led to the exploitation of women and children. We decided to throw a Christmas party for the women and children who were working in prostitution near the town where we had been establishing relationships. This was at the border of two Central American nations. Our purpose was to establish relationships and let people know we were there to help. It took a lot of hard work, fundraising, and prayer to plan that party. We worked with border patrol and immigration officials from both nations. We partnered with local churches from both nations, and churches in the United States also supported our effort. We brought food, presents, games, and generators. During the planning, we had not met one woman that could attend our party, but we continued to pray and trust God that women would attend. The weekend of the party we passed out flyers and waited with expectant hearts for what God had in store.

On December 5, 2009, 25–30 women and children showed up to our party. They couldn’t believe that someone would want to throw a party for people who worked in prostitution, and we were overjoyed that so many people came! We had spent months of prayer and fasting preparing, and it was the most amazing feeling to see God show up this way! We were able to share the love of God and Jesus, and for two to three hours the women and children were simply our honored guests. We were just there to let them know they were loved and seen. One of the head immigration officials who was there said, “There’s so much light here tonight—and I’m not just talking about the generators!”

This party was the catalyst of my journey to help men, women, and children involved in and affected by sexual exploitation. The party furthered our understanding of the great need to help. That weekend launched our ministry. We developed a vision and passion to end exploitation not only in that area but in the whole nation I was serving as a missionary. After that event, while I was so encouraged by what I had seen God do, I was also fully aware that if I committed to help in this way, I would be staying longer than five months, dealing with dangers, and learning a different language and culture. I recognized the complexity of this type of ministry and my lack of experience in this area. I knew that I would be away from the support of my family and church community back home. When I said yes, I weighed the cost and I did so with much prayer and fasting. But I felt that God was truly calling me to this type of ministry in this particular place, and I knew that what I lacked, I could rely on God to provide.

Over the years God has sent countless amazing people to help—people with experience, knowledge, talents, resources, and strengths that I don’t possess. I wasn’t drawn to help survivors of exploitation because it was sad and terrible; I was drawn to the redemptive side, partnering with Jesus to see freedom come. It was a journey with God of learning lessons and learning from mistakes. I had a photo of the little legs of the children of the women in prostitution from the night of our first event, the Christmas party on the border. I often looked at that photo and thought, “What if the world looked different for those little legs. What if they could have a different future?” I became passionate about prevention, ending human trafficking before it could ever start. I had a passion that a child would never have to be exposed to it. There was much trial and error in such a huge task. We did much research and outreach to inform our programs. At that time there were limited resources on how to do prevention of exploitation in a programmatic, replicable way. We were pioneers of sorts. We started to learn all the factors that put people at risk and make them vulnerable. We tackled the prevention side through a relational lens because this is the way we felt God was calling us to work.

That was over seven years ago. And the photo of those little legs on the bench has been my constant reminder of why I fight. Today I am amazed at the number of people God has allowed our team to serve. I have met many wonderful men, women, and children. I have seen God make crooked paths straight. I have seen God turn the seemingly impossible into possible. Enemies have become friends. Dark has become light. Hopelessness has transformed to hope. I have witnessed the power of love against shame, hate, and violence. I have seen love bring freedom.

If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,”
even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you. Psalm 139:11–12

#107 Missionaries in the Mountains: Prayers in the Subway

June 6, 2020May 29, 2017 by pamamilliongodstoriescom

Photo by Cara Dee Photography

I have been helping at The Lydia’s House, rehab for ladies; I teach a bible study on Friday afternoons.

I always pray with the ladies when I’m about to leave. In my prayer, I asked God to overfill our hearts (let it spill out) with His love, so everyone would see it and ask about it.

About three hours later, I was picking up subs at Subway. I called in the order but the lady said she got busy and wasn’t able to make them. I said, “No problem.” So I stood in line and I noticed she was the only one working. My thought, it was a Friday night and only one employee, wow. As I stood in line, I noticed the line behind me was getting longer. At this point I could tell the worker was getting frustrated. She made a call to ask for help to come in. By this time the line was 10 people behind me. She looked at me with a huge sigh and said, “You look like a sweet Christian lady; could you pray for me?” I said, “Most definitely!! I prayed for her there, in the car, and after I got home. Then I remembered my prayer.

Thank you God for answering prayers and letting your love show though me.

#102. Missionaries in the Mountains: Locked out of the Bible Mart

June 6, 2020May 3, 2017 by pamamilliongodstoriescom

Photo by Amy Wallen Photography

I was a devout atheist for many years. I worked at a restaurant, and one of the women that worked with me accepted Christ and her life was radically transformed. The change in her life led me to an openness to God, but I needed more proof.

I moved to another state and asked God to show me He was real. I went to church and saw that everyone had a Bible, and I knew then that I needed a Bible. I was working as a locksmith at the time, and the next morning, I got a call from a man who was locked out of his business. I asked him where he was located and he told me he was locked out of the Faith Bible Mart. I thought this was an odd coincidence, but it got even more interesting when I arrived at the Bible Mart. The door was unlocked and the man said he didn’t need me after all. He said he tried the key one more time after he called me and it worked. I gave the lock a good check, taking it apart to make sure there were no issues that could have caused the problem—and NOTHING. The lock was in good shape with no problems. There was no reasonable explanation as to why he couldn’t get in the Bible Mart that morning. I didn’t charge the man but I did ask him for an adult beginner Bible.

This is just one example of many. God repeatedly showed me that He was real. Not only did God prove His existence to me, but He also proved that He knew who I was and that He loved me.

God led me to give my life to Christ when I was 28 years old. This is also when I met my wife. She had been involved in church her whole life and had much knowledge but had lost her passion. I didn’t have her knowledge, but I was so passionate for the Lord. Together we made a great team! Now, many years later, we are serving together as full time missionaries in the mountains of Kentucky. When I look back and think about the transformation of my life, I am in awe of God. His patience, His love, His power, His provisions amaze me!

With all my heart I will praise you, O Lord my God.

Psalm 86:12

#100 Merciful and Gracious

June 12, 2020April 23, 2017 by pamamilliongodstoriescom

Artwork by Lily Murphy

My grandparents raised me until I was six years old. They were very godly people. We went to church regularly and they taught me great values. When I was six years old my mom got married and I went to live with her and my stepdad, who adopted me. My stepdad and I fought a lot, mostly because I was disrespectful. When I was 16 we got into a fight and he threw me out of the house. I ran the streets and began using drugs.

By age 17, I was trafficking drugs and had my first felony by age 18. I went to jail but my parents bonded me out in two days. In the next couple of years, I started cocaine. By age 20, I had six counts of felony receiving stolen property. I went to prison and started reading the Bible. I was interested but not committed. After I got out of prison, I violated my parole with alcohol and cocaine and spent six more months in prison. This happened four times with the same result…each time I went back to prison. So between 2000–2004, my life was spent in and out of prison. While I was out of prison, I went to college and completed courses. Finally, I successfully completed parole and graduated college with a degree in social work and a 3.36 GPA.

Instead of using my social work degree, I bought three nightclubs with the money I inherited when my mom died. One was a rave club. The clubs produced a massive amount of money. I went into drug dealing, selling Ecstasy in the rave club. I was flying in and out of Miami and Vegas to get drugs. I bought restaurants and opened a real estate company. But then things started crashing down around me. My best friend overdosed. My business partner committed suicide. Then a soldier got a drug in one of my nightclubs that killed him, and girl at one of my clubs got a drug that caused her to go into a coma. The police arrested a dealer in Miami and eventually that led the police to me. I was sentenced to 12 years in a federal prison. But even when I went to federal prison, I was still thinking about how I could develop my drug business to be even bigger and better when I got out.

While in prison, I got into an argument with a guard, which got me thrown into the “hole”—basically prison within prison. There on my bunk was a small Gideon New Testament Bible. I started reading it, and by Matthew 16 I started crying. I said, “I am checking out of this. If you’re real, God, show me.” Now the hole is very loud, with prisoners making all kinds noise, but within minutes after saying this, everything went quiet. Everything stood still. A warm sensation wrapped me up and held me. It literally felt like someone holding me. In my head I heard, “You’re forgiven.”

Then I said, “Yes Lord, but what about this…?”

“You are forgiven.”

And again I asked, “But what about this…?”

“You are forgiven.”

Back and forth this went on until I finally believed I was forgiven. Then I sat and cried. I still felt that warmth, like I was being held. Then from my toes to the top of my head, the presence just swept through my body. It was like I had just taken my first breath. The hair on my arms stood up. Everything in the prison cell was beautiful. Even the stainless-steel toilet was gleaming. I felt such joy. From that moment on everything in my life changed. I started reading my Bible again and soon a young man was brought to share the hole with me. We became great friends; we prayed together and became brothers in Christ. Later, when we were both out of the hole, he invited me to a Bible study and I started to go. I told the prison chaplain about my story and my experience with God, and he began discipling me into the faith.

I prayed, “Lord, I want to know the truth. Show me what is true and what is not.” The Lord sent people and books to show me the truth. God sent me books on theology and apologetics, defense of the Christian faith. And God opened my eyes to truth through the scriptures. I hungered so much for God’s Word and spent six hours each day studying the Bible and memorizing verses.

I began to see how God was blessing me after I got out of the hole. Usually when you go to the hole, all your personal possessions are destroyed or thrown away. When I got out of the hole, all of my possessions were returned to me in perfect shape. Everything was stacked neatly in a bag. Even my underwear was folded. One of the prison officers said to me later, “How did you like that bag? Be blessed!” This just does NOT HAPPEN IN PRISON! Then I had a court date about the altercation with the guard that landed me in the hole and they forgave it and cleaned it off my record. I got the best job you could get in prison. I started serving in the prison church, ushering and preaching from time to time. I was moved to a prison in Virginia, then to Kentucky, my home state. Here I was discipled by a wonderful prison chaplain, a committed, godly man.

At the end of my prison sentence, the prison chaplain told me he felt God calling him to help me. Three days before I was released from prison, the chaplain told me to call a men’s ministry and recovery program. I interviewed there and connected with the director. I spent the next six years working there, preaching, teaching, cooking, counseling, volunteer coordinating, and renovating their building. Because I had a social work degree, I was eligible to become a certified alcohol and drug counselor. A counselor I had met when I was released was the counselor for the resident drug abuse program and agreed to be my supervisor for this certification process. After I became a certified counselor, I created my own ministry for outpatient substance abuse treatment. This ministry has expanded and I now have my own building. In 2016, I went back to graduate school to become a licensed professional clinical counselor in mental health. I will graduate in July 2018 with a Masters in Counseling and Human Development after which I will be able to expand my ministry into mental health counseling as well as substance abuse counseling. I am also now working for Job Corp, an agency of the U.S. Department of Labor and Department of Agriculture. In this role I work with 16-24 year olds to provide counseling and substance abuse prevention and intervention.

My life bears witness to a God that is MERCIFUL and GRACIOUS. He gave me life. He gave me a chance to turn it all around. I should have been in prison for life. I damaged and destroyed thousands of lives. It still amazes me…moves me to tears. I am FORGIVEN. Because of God’s love that is beyond all comprehension and Christ’s sacrifice, I am FORGIVEN. Pure. Blameless. My slate is clean.

“What do you think? If a man owns a hundred sheep, and one of them wanders away, will he not leave the ninety-nine on the hills and go to look for the one that wandered off? And if he finds it, truly I tell you, he is happier about that one sheep than about the ninety-nine that did not wander off.”

Matthew 18:12–13